Toldot 2011 - 5772
A few times a year my wife and I have the opportunity to co-write sermons. Last night, after a busy day of family, friends and a proper amount of food we had the pleasure of discussing Thanksgiving, Black Friday and Torah. The following is the result of those conversations.
This week's Torah portion, Toldot, describes the famous incident of Esau trading away his birthright to his brother Jacob for some stew:
"One day Jacob was cooking lentil stew, and Esau came in hungry from the field. Esau declared, 'I'm famished. I beg you to feed me that red stew!' Jacob said, 'In exchange, sell me your birthright.' Esau said, 'Behold, I am dying, so what good is this birthright anyway?!' So Esau agreed to sell the birthright. Jacob gave him bread and lentil stew. Esau ate and drank, and went on his way, despising the birthright."
The obvious question here, asked for generations, is...why would Jacob take such unfair advantage of his brother in his hunger?
The sages largely conclude that there is no unfair advantage. Esau didn't really want the birthright in the first place. He didn't want the responsibility that went along with it. Painting Esau as a relatively uncouth lad, our tradition indicates that he wanted the "easy way out." It's not much of a stretch of an interpretation when the Torah says "he despised the birthright."
But there is an interesting twist here. Esau says that he is "starving to death." Jewish law is very clear that a person is not bound by agreements that are made under threat of death. So how does this deal really work out? Jacob gives Esau bread and stew - first the bread, to abate the urgent hunger, and then the stew. Esau, theoretically, had a chance to take back the deal in between courses of the meal. But he does not.
In fact, Esau's actions reveal that physical desire is all that really motivates him. "I'm going to die anyway." Basically, he is saying "the world began when I was born, it ends when I die. Who cares about intangible things like a spiritual birthright? I'll be happy once I've eaten the stew."
In fact, the Midrash even expands on this. It explains that Esau mocks Jacob afterwards. "I got a hot bowl of soup and you got an abstract future reward!" he says.
Today was Black Friday, in case you haven't noticed. I recently wrote about this time of year in our monthly bulletin to be released next week, but still had more to say on the matter. I felt, this year more than ever, that the business of putting stuff on sale was unbelievably in our faces. No matter how you feel about standing in line for good deals at 4am, it's hard to reconcile the messages of the holiday of Thanksgiving with its immediate aftermath. As one of my facebook friends posted - I love Thanksgiving - no gifts to buy, give or get! But the barrage of messages about buying doesn't seem to stop...
Esau is driven by his physical desire. He wants instant gratification, he is drawn to the stew as "red stuff." Our teachers say that he is merely drawn to its packaging, its bright color. Its content is not that important to him, he just likes the way it looks.
Esau faces the same dilemma that we all face. Body vs. Soul. Which one do we feed first? Which one is easier to feed? We know that a sign of maturity is the ability to get past our need for instant gratification - but the multimillion dollar media campaigns are trying to keep us from the maturity of that decision. Get it now! Buy now! Don't wait! Give me some of that red stuff! While I love reading all the advertisements and seeing all the “Red” stuff hocking interesting technology I have to constantly remind myself that I don’t need anything.
We've gotten used to a world where immediacy is normal. And the marketers want it that way. They don't want us to grow up, they want us to demand toys, games, new gadgets, instant stuff!
So what do we do? We can moderate our physical needs - not eliminate them, certainly Judaism is not in favor of that at all - by turning our physical moments into spiritual ones. It's as simple as stopping to say a short blessing before eating, for example. To pause before we "dig in" is a counter balance, a reminder that we are not, in fact, starving to death.
A 19th century rabbi, Alexander Ziskind, took as his custom to break his Yom Kippur fast with bony fish. In doing so, he was forced to eat slowly as he picked out the bones, and not gorge on his food. This was a personal determination to maintain control over the physical urge. Between Wednesday night and Thursday afternoon at my in-laws we had so many good meals that I kept asking myself what is the point of the turkey dinner? I’d already had three incredible meals between erev yom tov and our Turkey dinner. So I made a point to remind myself that I don’t need to fill up just because so much delicious food sat in front of me. I made sure to take small portions and savor each bite as small blessings added to my life.
It's very easy, especially this time of year, to get caught up in the need for stuff, in the need to acquire new and better stuff, in the need to get that "red stuff" just as Esau did. And so we must not lose sight of our greater purpose in life, this time of year and all throughout the year...to connect with our selves and our loved ones, to put our need for instant gratification a little beyond us, and to focus on what we have, not on what we want to have.
It's not so hard to imagine that we could be talking about Abraham, Isaac, and Esau...our forefathers. But Esau's overwhelming lack of interest in future rewards as opposed to immediate rewards, lead us to speak of our patriarchs Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. Quite the future dividends paid by one bowl of soup, don't you think? Imagine the future dividends we can each earn from a few moments spent in prayer, in learning, in blessing, in time spent with our loved ones...as the holiday of Thanksgiving comes to a close, let us not forget its essential meaning - and let us remember to pause, wait, breathe...and give thanks.
May we all give thanks to the family and friends who fill our lives with such joy and laughter.
May we all give thanks for the ability to provide meals not only for ourselves but for those in need through our donations and feed the homeless programs.
May we all give thanks for our community that brings us together each week and not just once a year to sing, pray and give thanks for all our many blessings.
May our creator bless all our lives with health, happiness and contentment for the miracles filling our lives.
Kayn yehi ratzon - may this be God’s will.